A game of social pickleball is one of the great sources of leisure and joy in my life. Having played for awhile, I want to share what I have noticed works well in social pickleball situations and what really tends to tank your friendships and games. These are my do’s and don’ts of social pickleball. These are etiquette and considerations based on more social, open-play situations, not tournaments or leagues, where there may be strict guidelines.
Be considerate of your partner
Have a friendly attitude towards your partner. Compliment and support them. Don’t yell at your partner or be mean to them. There is no need to give them unwanted advice either even if you are sure they need it. A happy partnership can lead to a victory, even if you might technically be weaker than your opponents.
Be fair about calling the points
If it is on your side and If you see a ball that is in, call it in. If it is out, call it out. Don’t fudge and call it out, when you know that it is in just to win a point. People want to play with fair people. Short term wins that are lies will hurt you in the long run and destroy your integrity.
Accept the opponent’s call
If the ball is on your side, it is your responsibility to judge whether it is in or out and announce it. Trust your opponent’s call. They are closer to the ball and in the best position to judge. That is also the rule in pickleball. Don’t challenge them on it, even if it looks in to you.
Apologize for occasionally losing your cool
It is normal to occasionally get emotional about a call. I accidentally said to my opponent “I thought the ball was in”. I immediately apologized and said ” Sorry, it is your call”. I have known people to walk off the court out of anger. Try to avoid these acts in the first place, but you are human and it may happen. Apologize to your opponents or partner as soon as you are able and get on with play.
Be on time
If you have a open play where you can drop in anytime, then you don’t need to worry about this. However, if you are in a situation, where you signed up to play with people at a specific time, be early or arrive on time. Don’t make people wait. If you happen to be late, apologize and try harder next time.
Socialize with people between games
When you are resting between games, or before or after, make an effort to socialize. That is why you are playing social pickleball. Ask them about themselves, where did they grow up? What are their hobbies? Did they have a nice weekend? Improvise and let the conversation guide you to the next topic.
Be willing to play with people of all levels
Many times there may be a level posted on open play. If so respect the level requirement. You may clearly have a social play event designated such as a “drink and dink”. If you are playing in a social open play that doesn’t have a level posted or DUPR requirement, then generally the expectation is that you will be playing with people of all levels. Have a nice attitude, whether the players are above or below your level. Don’t be condescending or arrogant to lower-level players or intimidated by someone that is better than you. Remember, this is a social game and the point is to have fun.
Work on growing your game
Even in social pickleball, make an effort to always improve. That can be by taking lessons or clinics, watching instructional videos or simply by playing at regular intervals. Focus on one thing at a time. People like to be around others that have a growth mindset. However, don’t be too intense about it during social play.
Connect with people you like outside of Pickleball
If you meet people your really connect with in pickleball, it is okay to exchange phone numbers or email. Then definitely follow through with whatever activity you agreed on the get together about. My friends I met in a clinic. I reached out to them to play afterwards. They are now some of my closest friends and we actually now organize a social pickleball group together. Be considerate and if needed discreet with those around you, should you not be exchanging numbers with everyone.
The one caution is to avoid too many long text or email chains with groups. This starts to get annoying and bothersome. For game scheduling consider using an app to avoid too many text messages.
Call the score before you serve
Always call the score before you serve. Do so loudly so others can hear. Don’t rely on everyone else to do this for you. One of the hardest parts of pickleball at first is getting used to scoring. Once you get the hang of it, it becomes second nature. However, as you focus on the game, you may occasionally forget or lose track. It is totally okay to ask, “hey, what’s the score?”
Obey the rules of the courts or club you are playing at
If you are playing at a private club, respect the rules of the club. Don’t sneak members in or break the rules of the club. I have seen people get kicked out for violating policies in regards to coaching, music, alcohol, etc. If in doubt ask what the rules are. This also goes for public courts.
Let people know in advance if you have to drop out
If you have to sign up in advance, and then realize you have a commitment, as much in advance as possible, (preferably days) let others know you can’t play. Or cancel on your scheduling app as soon as possible.
Have good sportsmanship
Be fair and friendly. Be on time, and honor your commitments to play. Be the person of integrity that everyone likes to be around. That is the key to have a great experience on and off the court.
Forgive yourself for points you miss
Brush off a missed serve or ball that you hit out. Get on with the game. Don’t say “why can’t I get my serves in” or I’m really off my game today”. This mindset tends to spiral out of control. Let yourself off the hook and get on with the game.
Acknowledge great shotmaking on both sides of the court
Occasionally, say “great shot” or compliment someone on a great play. “wow, what a serve!”. Be authentic and specific. Do this even if your opponent makes a great shot.
Tap paddles after every game
Always end every game by meeting at the net and either tapping the paddle head or bottom of the handle with your opponents. Smile and say ‘great game’ or something similar. Be thankful that you had the opportunity to play such a fun game with social people.
Being fun, and social as well as having consistency, fairness and integrity will take you far in social pickleball. Follow these “Do’s and Don’ts of social pickleball” etiquette guidelines and watch your friends and games flourish. May your pickleball game be filled with leisure and joy!
